Am I Perfect Now?
by ausllylover
Summary: "Am I perfect?" "No," Austin says stepping closer and taking her hand. "But that's why I love you."/ Ally changes because she feels like she isn't good enough. *ONE-SHOT*


**WARNING: OOC & ANOREXIC.**

Ally was never the perfect girl. She never even considered herself to be a perfect girl. Even when she was dating Austin, she didn't seem good enough for him.

Yeah she felt like she was on Cloud 9. But she didn't feel like she was on Cloud 10-if that made any sense. She didn't feel like she was good enough. She felt like she wasn't perfect.

But when they broke up, it was time for Ally's total destruction. She was on Cloud 0- if that made any sense. She had 0 perfect things in her body and in her personality, by just breaking up with Austin, she knew it. How could she increase the possibility of adding more numbers to the left of 0? She could be on Cloud 80 maybe. _Maybe_.

But only if she was perfect.

And she wasn't.

So she will become perfect.

How could she be perfect?

/

She knew why Austin broke up with her. It's because she wasn't pretty. Putting on makeup will make you pretty. Or at least she thought. She felt pretty.

Just for a minute.

But by the time was up, she was back to hating her old self.

How could she be perfect?

/

She always knew that her clothes weren't stylish. She knew THAT was the reason Austin never really liked her. She needed new clothes. Clothes that could attract more boys. Clothes that showed more skin.

Maybe Austin would like her then.

But soon she was back to hating her old self.

How could she be perfect?

/

"Ally you've been acting different," Austin finally says one day.

"Different?" she asks brushing it off. Why would he care? He never thought she was perfect. Why would he look at her so..new? "I'm just looking for a change," she says simply. The words hang in the air like ghosts. She picks up her book and leaves the store without another word.

She didn't know though that Austin was worrying about her condition.

/

She sat down one day realizing the solution. How to be perfect. She was just so...fat. Austin didn't like her because she was big. That's how it worked.

She needed to fix this.

Now.

But how? How could she be perfect? Suddenly the perfect solution came to mind.

/

Ally was walking down the hallway, carrying her books like normal. "Ally are you okay?" Austin asks touching her arm.

"I'm fine!" she says with a fake smile. A smile she has been practicing. "Why would you think so?"

"You seem.. different. And pale. And you don't look so well," Austin says grabbing her shoulder. She suddenly drops to the ground, dropping all of her books in the process. "Ally? Ally-are you okay?"

"Yes of course!" she says a bit to quickly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!" she almost shouts.

"Let me help you with those books," he offers.

"No, no please they're mine," she says pushing him away.

"You seem weak right now," he says coming closer again and trying to help her.

"So now I am weak? I am too weak to carry a couple of books!" she starts to shout. Really this time. The look on Austins face frightens Ally, but she carry's on. "I'm too weak now? Well I'll show you Austin! I'm not too weak for anything!" she says, and picks up her books and struts away.

A tear streams down Austin's face and he whispers, "It's happening.."

/

Ally growls. "10 pounds? That's it?" She takes her feet off the scale and prepares to go to bed.

Perfect girls don't sleep. They need exercise. She put down her tooth brush and went to the treadmill. She start to ran. And she ran until it was morning.

Exhausted she took a shower and prepared for school. She knew there were bags under her eyes. "Perfect girls don't have bags under their eyes. Austin won't like me." She carefully puts makeup over it, and prepares for school. Not eating breakfast. Not packing a lunch. And not planning to have dinner either.

When she went to school, Austin knew something was up. "Look at me," Austin says while grabbing Ally's arm. She turns around with her fake smile, and 'perfect' body.

"What?" she asks through her teeth.

"What is going on?" he asks with a whisper shout.

"Nothing!" Ally protests. "I'm just changing my figure," she says and smiles with her lips.

Austin puts his finger over her concealed bagged eyes and wipes in finger, finding concealer over it. "Makeup?" he shouts. "Ally this isn't you? What ever you are doing please stop! You're hurting me and everybody else around you!"

"I never meant anything to you," she whispers and escapes from his grasp. "I was just a toy. I'm not hurting you. I'm choosing to be like this. I'm only hurting myself, and it's none of your business what I choose to do with my body. Because you never loved me the way I loved you." And with that she picked up her backpack and left Austin alone in the hallway.

She was wrong. He did love her the way she loved him.

/

_after school and at sonic boom_

"Ally!" Austin says barging into Sonic Boom. "I want to talk about-"

"There is no need to talk about it," she says like a robot.

"Ally, your condition, it's-" But Ally couldn't hear the rest. Her vision started to go blurry and all she could hear were whispers. She gripped on to the counter tightly and tried to remain upright. She suddenly fell backwards with a thud on her head.

Austin came rushing for her, lifting her up for support. The last words she said to him before she fell unconscious were, "Am I perfect now?"

/

_Beep, beep, beep_. That's all Austin heard. "I should have realized it earlier!" Austin says, blaming himself for the condition Ally is in. "It's all my fault!"

"It's no one's fault!" Trish says trying to comfort Austin.

"Yes it is!" Austin screamed. "It is my fault we broke up! She thought she wasn't good enough for me! She tried to make herself perfect for me! She tried to become skinnier and prettier and different! And it was because of me! She was already perfect the way she was! It was just stupid me thinking we weren't ready for a relationship!" Austin growled.

"Austin, it's only been a few days. Just have some rest and she'll be awake in the morning!" his mother Mimi beckoned. "Come on sweetheart." But Austin couldn't bear leaving Ally all alone in a hospital bed.

She wasn't awake the next day.

The day finally came though when the nurses let visitors see Ally

/

Austin stepped into the room like it was an unexplored planet. Every foot step felt like 1,000 years. Every breath felt like it was wasted. He slowly descended into the room to see Ally laying there on a bed. Barely breathing. Barely alive. But he felt like maybe, _maybe_, it was going to be okay. Food was being fed into Ally's stomach through a tube.

She didn't move much, other than the occasional flinch from her arm. He made his way up to her enclosing her hand into his and whispered, "Please stay."

/

Another week past by until he heard a whisper. "Am I perfect?"

He bit his lip, trying to restrain himself from taking her into his arms and telling her everything is okay. "Y-you do realize that you could have died Ally," he says a second a way from crying. "You do realize that don't you?"

"Answer my question," she demands, loosing her strength once again.

"You had no food in your body. You could have died," he says in a half whisper. "You need food Ally. You need food to survive."

"Answer my question," she says one last time. "Am I perfect?"

"No," Austin says stepping closer and taking her hand. "But that's why I love you."

She bites her lip slightly and takes in everything. From her fainting to her ending up in a hospital. "Stay with me," Austin whispers. "Promise me."

"I promise," she says before her eyelids shut. "I promise.."

/

"Tell me," Ally says lying down in her hospital bed holding Austins hand. She has made some progress on her recovery. She has been at the point where she is able to breath on her own and eat on her own and talk for an hour.

"Tell you what?" Austin asks squeezing her hand.

"Tell me why you broke up with me. But you still loved me," Ally says blinking slowly.

"I thought we weren't ready. I never thought you weren't good enough for me. I always thought you were to good for me. I thought it was to good to be true," he smiles and squeezes her hand again. "I don't want to make the same mistake again."

She does a small smile. "When will you be out?" he asks.

Her eyelids start to droop shut again. "Soon," she whispers. He then leaves her alone while she try's to fall asleep. Before she falls asleep, she asks, "Am I perfect?"

"Yes, just the way you want to be."

**(A/N) I KNOW IT OOC BUT YEAH K BYE.**

**Review please! Auslly is ruining my life.**


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